At 10 years old, your child would have reached yet another milestone in their young lives; they would have hit their first double-digit number in their age and feel more “grown-up”.

Naturally, they will be more independent, able to to do a lot of things by themselves and ready to step onto the threshold of becoming young adults.

In Primary 4 now, they would have advanced academically in school and are now able to read, write, count and articulate their thoughts in conversation.

But what about the other life skills such as self-awareness, responsibility, character and self-sufficiency ─ things that are necessary to take on the real world when they grow up?

Here are 10 skills your child should have by the time they are 10 years old.

10 skills your child should have by the time they are 10

1. They know how to bathe, brush their teeth, groom and dress themselves.

By age 10, they should be practising personal hygiene and know how to bathe, groom and dress themselves. (Image Credit: Designed by Freepik)

By age 10, they are no longer babies needing mummy to brush their teeth, bathe and put on their clothes for them. They should know by this age when they should brush their teeth, wash their hair, bathe and pick out clothes that are colour-matched and appropriate for the occasion.

If they are going for their art class or piano lessons, what should they be wearing? If they are visiting Aunty Mei to celebrate her birthday at a restaurant or going for tuition or for football in the field outside, what are the clothes that would be most appropriate?

Mummy shouldn’t have to pick their clothes out for them. Let them make their own decisions. At 10, this should be completely manageable.

2. They know the SOP for keeping COVID-19 at bay, especially while away from home.

With schools having reopened, students and teachers are encouraged not just to wash their hands regularly, but to do so correctly. (Image Credit: Freepik)

In the age of the Coronavirus, they should know why it is necessary to practice good hygiene and wash their hands often with soap and water or use a sanitizer often.

They also must know why and when they should wear a face mask, why they must keep a distance from their classmates and not share food and personal items when in school, and be responsible enough to remember to carry out the MOE’s Standard Operating Procedures (SOP) diligently, especially when mum is not there to remind them.

3. They know how to be safe and sensible online.

For their safety, children must be taught to be discerning and wise when consuming or sharing content of any kind, online. (Image Credit: cottonbro from Pexels)

It’s not just about exploring the World Wide Web but the deluge of instant messaging and social networking apps that make the internet such a fascinating, fun, educational, confusing, dark and dangerous place for kids.

Sure, you can put in parental restrictions, cyberbullying blocks, inappropriate content filtering, or even a Virtual Private Network (VPN) to protect your whole family’s privacy.

But no matter how many of these controls you put in, you can’t block everything and you can’t monitor his online activities all the time, especially when all his friends are already on TikTok, Snapchat, WeChat, Instagram, Facebook, Messenger, Skype, WhatsApp, Telegram…you name it.

On top of that, there’s also the rise of online scams, paedophile and gambling sites that you may not even be aware of to block off. End word: You can’t block them all!

The best way to protect children online is not by breathing down their neck every time they go online, but by giving them the power of knowledge.

Have you heard of this saying?

Give a man a fish and you feed him for a day. Teach a man to fish and you feed him for a lifetime.

It’s the same concept here. Teach him how to be safe online by focusing on critical thinking skills, discernment, wisdom, values and ethics.

Ask your 10-year-old: Is this right or wrong? Should you share this personal picture or this private information with someone you don’t know? How do you spot a dubious profile? Should you be visiting this site?

By encouraging your child to figure out the answers themselves, you would empower him with the knowledge to make the internet a safe and positive place of learning, and not one of the cyber risks where he could fall prey to.

4. They have a sense of direction and know how to get home.

Knowing their way around the neighbourhood and how to get home will prevent them from getting lost (Image Credit: vicky-tran-pexels)

Your child may get driven to and from school by a school bus, or you drive them to Taekwondo or ballet class but get them to navigate your drive to these frequented locations or around the neighbourhood so that they observe their surroundings and have a sense of direction.

In an emergency, they won’t get lost. It’s also a good idea to have them follow directions on the phone or give their approximate location by describing the landmarks nearby. (Aside from getting lost on the road, lots of children also get lost in shopping complexes and carnivals).

Having a phone and knowing how to give you their location accurately will save everyone a lot of panic and tears).

5. They know how to reach you

Children should be taught to memorise their parents’ phone numbers from early on so that in the event of an emergency, they can reach you immediately. You don’t have to wait till age 10 to teach your children this. (Image Credit: tirachardz-Freepik)

For their safety, it is important your child has his home address, the house phone number and both parents’ mobile phone numbers memorised.

One more thing that’s often overlooked ─ he should also know your name and his Dad’s name.

In an emergency, if the authorities such as the hospital or the police were to ask: “What is your mother’s name?”, you don’t want him answering: “Mummy”, or “What is your father’s name?”: “Daddy”.

6. They know how to react to an emergency

Should children need to call the ambulance or the fire brigade, they need to be able to give their location. That is why it is important they know their address and location (Image Credit: pexels-pixabay)

As a 10-year-old, your child should have enough presence of mind and some first aid skills to respond to minor accidents and even real emergencies.

Minor Emergency

Cut Finger: Run wound under cold tap water, or apply pressure to stop bleeding, put on a plaster.
Burn or Scald: Run burnt area under cool running water for 20 minutes. Do not use ice. Cover burnt area with loose plastic covering such as clingfilm.
Bruise and Swelling: Ice the bruise for 20 minutes
Scraped Knee: Wash the scrape with water, remove debris, apply antibiotic ointment, then bandage it.
Nosebleed: Sit upright, lean forward, pinch the nose, press towards face and hold this position for 10 to 15 minutes.
Clothes on Fire: Stop, drop and roll.

Major Emergency

Call 999 (from landline). This emergency hotline connects to the Police, Fire & Rescue (Bomba), and Ambulance service.
Call 112 (from mobile phone): This number will be redirected to 999.

7. By 10, they should have time-management and organizational skills.

Children should have a sense of time, timing, and time management to organize their daily schedules and timetable. By age 10, they shouldn’t need you to remind them to do every single daily task every hour of the day. (Image Credit: torwaiphoto-Freepik)

By age 10, they should how to organize their own schedules and manage their time around homework, online classes, meals, sports, extra-curricular activities, enrichment classes, hobbies, playdates and household chores.

Yes, they should also be helping you with the housework by this age, such as cleaning their own room or even helping to prepare meals and wash dishes.

Regardless of whether they are a boy or a girl, they are old enough to be helping you out with house chores, fix themselves a snack to feed themselves, or maybe even cook rice and other light meals.

You could help them get organized by setting up a schedule or timetable for them to follow.

8. They should know how to Problem-Solve.

Never be a helicopter mum if you want your kids to grow up resilient and independent. When children learn how to solve problems by themselves, they gain confidence in their ability to make good decisions. (Image Credit: jcomp-Freepik)

One of the most important things on raising confident, resilient, and independent children is to stop running to “save” them from every problem they run into in life.

Barring huge issues that need parental step-in, let them tackle challenges on their own. As “growing up kids earning their independence”, they shouldn’t need to run to mummy to solve every single challenge they are confronted with.

When children learn problem-solving skills, they learn to take on challenges without fear and ultimately become happier, more resilient, more confident, and more independent individuals. They also learn to be creative, resourceful and develop patience at the same time ─ things that will stand them in good stead later in life.

9. They know how to handle money and get the correct change.

Stumped by a vending machine? Children need to know the value of coins and notes and how to get the correct change. (Image Credit: Egor Myznik – Unsplash)

Malaysia is still very much a cash-based economy. Most of our shops and supermarkets run on cash transactions and definitely, all of our stalls, truck food and coffee shops are cash-based.

Your child’s school canteen is cash-based as are vending machines. As a growing child just beginning to learn to move about in the adult world, he needs to learn how to recognize the different-coloured bills, the different coins and their value and make purchases using cash.

If he wants to buy an ice-cream from the ice-cream man and the cone costs RM2.50, would he know how much he should get back if he hands over a RM5.00 note?

If he wants to buy a chocolate bar from the grocery shop, how much should he get back from RM10.00 if the chocolate costs RM5.90?

To help him learn, you could run some play-transactions with him and hone up his mental arithmetic at the same time.

10. They must have some financial literacy and learn how to save.

Children must know that money doesn’t grow on trees. However, they can make it grow by saving a part of their pocket money and putting it in a bank to earn interest. They may not understand how “interest” works but you can explain in simple age-appropriate terms.

Children should learn how money works from a young age. Tell them how Mummy and Daddy earn money to enable both of you to buy food, and toys for them.

However, not all of the money earned should be spent straight away as there is this thing called budgeting and putting aside some of the money for future use.

At age 10, they may not understand the big concepts of needing money for their university education or buying their own car but at their stage in childhood, if there is something they really, really want but cannot afford to buy straight away, they can learn to save up their own money to buy it. This gives them an immediate sense of why they need to save.

By giving them this responsibility to take charge of their own finances, children learn the basic tenets of saving and acquire a sense of achievement in doing so.

By age 10, they should already be actively saving. You can open a savings account for them at any bank, then show them how to log in to view their monthly statements so that they can see and feel proud of the money they have “grown” all by themselves.

For more tips and guidance on older children, visit Motherhood Story.